Politically Correct Nelson at Trafalgar

Go read the rest :))

Military Jokes Military Humor: "Nelson: 'Hold on, that's not what I dictated to Flags. What's the meaning of this?'

Hardy: 'Sorry sir?'
Nelson (reading aloud): '' England expects every person to do his or her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability.' - What gobbledegook is this?'
Hardy: 'Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting ' England ' past the censors, lest it be considered racist.'
Nelson: 'Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco.'
Hardy: 'Sorry sir. All naval vessels have now been designated smoke-free working environments.'
Nelson: 'In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the mainbrace to steel the men before battle.'
Hardy: 'The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. Its part of the Government's policy on binge drinking.'"